What if monkeys ran the world?
The cities and the jobs stay. The boss is a macaque now, and the paperwork has changed.
Evening over the capital, day one. The new management takes a look at the city.
Day 1
The morning news opens with a macaque at a government podium. A human interpreter stands beside it, translating one sentence behind. Most people assume it’s a prank.
By evening the prank story has fallen apart. The armies have stood down, the old ministers have been sent home, and the first order is about airports and grain.
Year 1
Daily life changes less than people feared. People still go to work and the trains still run, because the new rulers need humans to keep the machines going.
What changes is who you have to ask. Permits, rations, even the right to lock your own door now come from an office with a monkey behind the desk. Translators become the best-paid people in every city.
Year 10
Children grow up knowing the rules: don’t stare, don’t show your teeth, and always let the troop pass first. To them it’s simply how things are. Their parents still find it strange.
Most people live in the same flats as before. A few have left for the hills, to live without paperwork or electricity, and now and then someone wonders out loud whether that’s really so bad.
Who wins
- TranslatorsNothing gets done without them, so they can name their price.
- Engineers and electriciansMonkeys give the orders, but somebody still has to keep the lights on.
- Fruit growersThe new government has a very clear food policy.
Who loses
- PoliticiansEvery one of them is out of a job by the end of day one.
- ZoosThey close in the first month, for obvious reasons.
- People who like privacyYou now need a permit to put a lock on your own door.
- Banana loversGood luck finding one in the shops.
Monkeys already have politics, and it isn’t pretty. A macaque troop runs on rank, favours and family ties. A world run by monkeys might feel less like a revolution and more like an office you have worked in before.
Would you stay, or head for the hills?
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