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Animals

What if pets could sue?

Your dog can take you to court. The case is about all the walks you skipped.

2 min readUpdated

The spaniel is the one bringing the case.

The spaniel is the one bringing the case.

4%chance it
ever happens

4%chance this ever happens

Could it actually happen?

Courts have started to listen, a little. In 2014, a court in Argentina said an orangutan called Sandra had some basic rights, and lawyers in the US have tried, so far without success, to have an elephant freed from a zoo. Animal welfare laws already punish cruelty. Letting a pet sue its own owner, with its own lawyer, is a much bigger step that no country has taken.

Day 1

A spaniel is named as the one bringing the case. Its owner waits in the corridor in a borrowed tie, holding the lead. Through a handler, the judge asks about the hours the dog spends alone.

The jokes stop fairly quickly. The next case is a cat, and the cat’s file is thicker.

Year 1

Vets start writing reports the way doctors do. Animal shelters turn up with boxes of files. Owners keep a record of every walk, because it might be their defence.

Letting agents start advertising flats as “big enough for a dog, legally”.

Every walk gets written down, just in case.
Every walk gets written down, just in case.

Year 10

Animals that win don’t get money. They get more time outside, a door that opens and someone who comes home at a reasonable hour.

Kind owners barely notice the law. The others notice it every evening, at the time the walk is due.

The shelter arrives with a stack of files.
The shelter arrives with a stack of files.

Who wins

  • Animals left alone too longTheir long days now have a witness and a file.
  • SheltersA court case can rescue a dog faster than a donation.

Who loses

  • Owners who leave a dog in all dayThe evening walk is no longer optional.
  • Landlords of tiny flatsA court decides what counts as enough space.
  • People who wanted a low-effort petNeglect used to go unnoticed.
  • CourtsThe waiting list now includes leads and cat carriers.

The catch

Welfare laws can already punish a cruel owner, and that is where most countries stop. Giving the dog its own lawyer would mean deciding who speaks for the dog, and that question is harder than it looks.

Would your pet have a case against you?

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